Skip to main content

Fat bellied rants


These days I have so much to say but most times I just stay at the blinking cursor, is it writer’s block, I have no words to trap and put down; they’re flying free like birds outside the Sydney museum. It’s definitely not joy that I feel down in me, this is intense pain it's swelling up inside of me and I’ve not been drinking yeast.
          A mad professor told me once “I think it’s funny that you expect people to treat you the way you treat them” (inserts Joker laughter) life isn’t a fairytale your fairy godmother won’t appear one day and “hipity bipity boop” away all your pains you would face it and you would face most of it alone. 
I feel we are going through similar struggles and so we should try making things easier for each other. It's rather disgusting to see broken people break other people
; but this is becoming a norm.


2019? We go buy benzzzzzzzzzz! Lol, you didn’t tell me I would see shege, you didn’t tell me I would fight for my life, you didn’t tell me I would fight for my sanity, and you definitely didn’t tell me I’d lose so much on such short notice. Ever feel like a joke? 

Somedays in my life I want to ask if my life is a skit because I am not getting the joke. I want to spill more but hey this is supposed to be a happy place right? I want to disappear, delete accounts, and all contact information, go far far away with a new identity. I’m grateful for life and for the few gifts I can claim.

I’d write stories and better experiences when I am stable
for now it's just me and my ever-expanding fat belly

Comments

  1. Marachee25 June 2020 at 00:44

    🤗🤗🤗
    Breathe dear

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous25 June 2020 at 01:59

    OMG! I fell that way sometimes too! "Did I miss it? Did I take a wrong turn? Does it end?" Like my friend says "It isn't over until it is"

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Loving The Stethoscope

Who needs Dopamine transmission? being with you does the trick- anon On Loving the stethoscope… When I took the plunge I had no idea what the water currents felt like, if there’s one major decision which put me at crossroads of should I or shouldn’t i. It was the decision to date HND. What I know for sure is that after the first month or so everything changes, you get to be around this person more often and you get really comfortable around this person. I was quite comfortable at the beginning anyway but I obviously had my reservations, I remember this evening he was walking me down to where I can board a car; it was dark (thanks to the children of the underworld who stole solar panels for the university street lights) well if you know me well you’d know seeing well in the dark is an extreme sport for me most times I would walk right into a puddle before I realize. Well, he had seen a gutter ahead and offered to hold my hands to cross over in my stubbornness I told him “no
7 comments
Read more

GROWING UP AN ONLY CHILD

Growing up as only child has giving me a rare view of life, I’ve been constantly tagged with the only child syndrome with this tag which is somewhat overwhelming most times.  Just to correct the notion I don’t think any child decides to be an only child really, we should stop that. I’m an only child and aside growing up without siblings I don’t think I’m less of a human being than people with siblings. I never personally chose my status as an only child. The feeling that comes with being an only child could be somewhat contradictory at some points, one minute I’m excited about the new video game my dad bought for me and the next I feel bad because I’ve seen the game is fun in a two player mode, one moment I’m excited about my big box of clothes and the next I wonder what it would have felt like if I had  senior sister to give me hand-me-downs or a younger sister who would constantly borrow my clothes and wear them when they feel I’ve forgotten. This roller-coaster feeling is
2 comments
Read more

"LOVE" AND THE COFFEE SHOP

Time after time I always envisaged the day I’d find love in a coffee shop, so I had a lot of coffee and a caffeine addiction. So I sat in coffee shops reading novels while sipping on my hot creamy coffee hoping that one day “love” would bump into me spilling my coffee on my “Sefi Attah” and I would bend over to rescue my book drowning in the small puddle of creamy coffee, and maybe like those western movies he would be a perfect gentleman who would get to it before I do and apologise profusely and maybe offer to buy me another cup. Or perhaps I felt “Love”  would sit at the other end of the coffee shop taking quick glances at my book cover and ask out of curiosity why I choose to read Mario Puzo’s “ The Godfather” or Sun Tzu’s “ art of war” and probably tell me how he finds it intriguing that I make such book choices. After a long debate on God knows what I’d remember I have to get to a meeting and I could rush out leaving him with no contacts, but its “ Love” anyway. He would
4 comments
Read more